Who doesn’t need a break in the sun? Few people will say no to that. On this blog, we share our tips for booking that family vacation. We hope this will help someone and that we also will get some ideas and tips from you too.

So for us, we are a family of four, consisting of three adults and 1 teen. We love experiences and making memories. We have had to learn how to travel on a budget and so far we are grateful. We prefer to visit uncommon destinations💕.

Each year we set a realistic budget of how much in total we would like to spend on a Summer break. Once that’s determined, we start looking for offers, deals, sales etc. It’s such a commitment that my husband and daughter are married to. They invest so much time in researching places to visit etc. We learn a lot about ourselves, and potential destinations as a family through the planning sessions. This year our daughter and youngest planned this Sicily- Malta break meticulously it’s humbling 💗

We have found that once we have decided on destination, making a hotel reservation early is useful. We use Booking.com as well as Hotels.com and many other apps such as Trivago etc. We tend to book our summer holiday by Christmas time.

By booking early, most hotel reservations are free so you can swap or change to a certain period. This offers peace of mind as you many not want to commit to a holiday 8months in advance. Arbnb is a game changer for accommodation too, especially for city breaks. It has introduced us to amazing communities and apartments. We stayed in a quirk apartment in Copenhagen and as I write we are in a historic Italian apartment in Catania, Sicily in Italy. The apartment has won me some brownie points with teen daughter who is keen on history and all things beautiful.

Flights are tricky and a deal breaker when looking for family summer break. Being the single most expensive entity, we have allowed flights to determine our destination. For the past 4 years we have visited mainly Europe and North Africa (Spain, Portugal, Turkey, Moroccco) for that reason.

As for timing, in terms of when to go, it all depends with the two above as well as working schedules and family calendars really. We tend to go away mid August so that we break even the long six weeks. The past two years we have strived for two get aways. The first tends to be a mini city break in one of European capitals. In that break, it’s mostly about culture and history so we book walking tours, visit museums and places of interest. We absorb as much as we can about the city. Visiting street food markets is a MUST in our house thanks to hubby. Once that intellectual holiday is done, we then go on a chilled relaxed break by the pool/ beach. The beach holiday tends to be 5-7days long and we are ready to face the winter.

Hope this has been useful. Let us know how we can help. Share some ideas, tips and strategies for making an epic family holiday.

Does your family have traditions that you do for summer? Would love to hear from you.

We will soon be sharing more about our holiday experiences with each destination we have been, look out for details.

Take care.

Fadzai x

Webinar 12.09.2018

We were glad to be back on the webinar after the summer holidays. We talked about having the courage and confidence to slow down in a an era that celebrates busyness. We acknowledged that being a millennial mom has become hectic due to the need to fit in all these other activities.

Our key strategy was drawn from the life of Martha  who found herself so busy hosting, preparing and entertaining. It is recorded that Jesus encouraged Martha to slow down, not be so pre-occupied with what needs doing. Jesus went on to say to Martha :

Mary has chosen that good part, which will not be taken from her’ ” (Luke 10:39-42).

           Relationships are what matters

How are we investing in the relationships that matter the most; our families? Are we finding the time to unplug and make eye contact? On our most recent webinar last week 6.6.19 one mother acknowledged that the balancing act of being a career woman, wife, mother, daughter, friend, entrepreneur to mention a few is fraught with guilt and shame as we find ourselves spinning all these roles whilst feeling ineffective.

A great strategy was shared of the DINNER TABLE. Allowing the dinner table to be the centre and hub of family life. Putting boundaries and making it clear that no phones or gadgets are allowed on the table. Being committed to the art of breaking and sharing food together. For those of faith, it is illustrated in the book of Acts 1, that the apostles broke bread together and shared what they had. It is clearly mentioned that the Lord added so much to them whilst they were doing that.

What would you like to be added into your family life? For us, as we deliberately come to the table, we are saying ‘Lord increase your love, faith and hope in this family. Let this tradition proceed from this generation and many others to come. Allow our conversations to bring healing and peace in our home.

It is our prayer and hope that you found last week’s home work doable and achievable. We were tasked to develop the art of being self aware. One of the steps to do that, was to look back to our own childhood and find out what we thought was good parenting, and why? We then needed to know how that good parenting is measuring with our current.

We desire that you find the value to this gathering of brave and courageous mothers. We encourage you to take the steps towards growth and these small tasks are positive steps towards that. We look forward to hearing your courageous introspection.

Yours in pursuit of courage.

Fadzai xxx

Came across this facebook memory and a flood emotions came through. The year is 2011, April 27th to be exact. I was undertaking a postgrad certificate in Critical Care. It was an interesting time from the commute to juggling work and family. I got through it, passed whilst planning our marriage blessing back home.

Looking back, I have done all my tertiary education as a mom. I went into nurse training when our son was 3years old and fell pregnant mid-way, finishing the course with two children. The studying carried on pretty much every couple of years on average. I have thoroughly enjoyed the world of academia. Not the best organised mama but I seem to get through it. Will I go back to studying again? YES. I just need to find something that tickles my fancy, is useful and relevant.

Tips for surviving the juggle:

1– Create a Calendar that everyone can Access. Empower the family unit to use the calendar, so everyone knows who is where and doing what.

2- Cook and freeze meals on the weekend to be thawed and eaten during the week. This will help to save time. No time for cooking or detour to the takeaway? Buy food from the student canteen to take home.

3-Use public transportation, so you can study and answer emails on the train. I car shared with a colleague and that was the greatest blessing in revising on the way home, cut costs as well as as provided therapy when talking through the difficulties of studying, working and raising a family.

4-Access help from the student learning center early instead of procrastinating or trying to get family to help. Oh I remember expecting so much from my husband and children to help with graphs and diagrams so much to my frustration 😍

5-Don’t ignore your social life. You need and deserve relationships outside of your family. It’s tempting to want to drop those social events in a bid to study. Take time out and let your hair down. You will be more efficient when rested. I planned our marriage blessing whilst undertaking this course. That was my therapy and I have to say, that kept me sane.

6- Eat well, try not to miss breakfast, even if it’s a piece of fruit or yoghurt. Keep active, move your body more and get the needed energy and nutrients to the brain.

7-Pray and meditate. Prayer has the ability to energise and stabilise our thinking and well being. There are so many apps you can use on the go. Having a quiet time and deep breathing helps to keep calm.

If you know someone who could use the tips, please share. 💕

The confident mama

Find those mom-ents in your parenting journey that light your fire. Treasure and hold on to them. When my two were younger, those moments were in surplus. As they have both now transitioned into #teenhood, they are rare and far apart. The teen world can be quite complex such that sometimes they, themselves, don’t know how to articulate it.

As a professional, I know and appreciate teenage brain development. I know how hard it is to be misunderstood. As a mom, I need to contain them,  unpick these challenges all before we can have great warm mom-ments. You would think the unpicking would be easy because I believe we are almost always in tune with our children. In reality it is the hardest bit for me.

My greatest challenge is life outside my home. By the time I come in, after a full day’s work, I also would like to be acknowledged and they are probably in the midst of problem solving their own dramas 😞. It’s painful, I know. Most #parents will totally agree that parenting is challenging. However, there are moments we feel in control, fulfilled and purposeful. I am learning to embrace those mom-ments more and cherish them.

Look for those mom-ments. Be intentional in finding them. Repeat them as often as possible, being careful that you may get a different response or effect. My mom-ments are typically when I am well rested 😎😎 I am a better mom when I have had a good sleep, fresh air, meditation and not worrying much about dinner 😍. My children react better to me in that state.

Holidays tend to give us more of these #mom-ments. Take inspiration from them and replicate them at home maybe once a week and build to twice a week if possible. I know the sun and sea are major ingredients to it all. Take  vitamin D supplements 💊💊they are key to our moods and overall health. Remembee exercise too, however that may be 🤸🏽‍♂️🏊🏾‍♀️. I believe in good enough parenting and not perfect parenting.

Phone calls are vintage and a rarity these days, call another mom, encourage her. Not only will it leave you feeling good about being there for others, you are  also creating networks that are key to a good life

Good luck in living your mom- ments 🥂

#confidentmama 💕

What would I tell my younger self?. Not sure because the time and space was very different to what it is now. The landscape has changed drastically.

This  is me at 17yrs of age in high school.

The only challenge I had at that time, was that I madly in love with a boy who has since become the father of my two. Life was beautiful. I am grateful to my parents who sacrificed so much to send me to a good boarding school.  Deeply indebted to my siblings who had to endure months of sadza and kale while my parents recovered financially. I am forever grateful to their sacrifice.

I remember the back to school days. Not so much in primary school years but certainly in secondary and high school. I remember the agony and pain of doing my shopping, packing my bags, stripping my parents of every last penny before I bid farewell. I remember my father’s long heartfull speeches. Yes, I was gone for 3months at a time.

The fours years at the all girls Catholic school were hard. The conditions were even harder. It was in those formative years that my character was built through dedication, hard work and team work. I learnt and grew alot in that place. How I missed home!! I missed my siblings, the comfort and food. In the midst of all that, I knew very well and appreciated what my parents were trying to achieve.

My own teenage experiences in Zimbabwe are a far cry from my teens’ world. Boarding school may sound like abandonment and believe you me, I thought so too and I didn’t mince any words when I penned my thoughts to my  parents. I broke my father’s heart and mama came to visit the very next week.

While an average mom worries and gets excited about her children going back to school, us the #migrantmamas have a whole lot to deal with. To my fellow #diaspora parents like myself who still struggle with school culture, school mums and curriculum, I see and hear you. To those who have been forced/ blackmailed, nagged into overdrafts, by their teens, I feel you. Most of the phenomena that we now encounter is as foreign as quiche 🍘.

Issues around school can be complex. For instance, understanding and appreciating what mental health especially in children looks like is a cobweb. Our communities do not make it any easier as mental health remains a taboo. According to mental health UK, 1 in 10 average adolescent has a mental health condition. As mothers, we strive to be strong african women and expect the same for our children.

As intentional parents, our drive is to be deliberate on things that help and move us forward. One of the main things we strive for is coming together in an atmosphere of learning together and loving each other. Prayer is key to our parenting jounrneg so this September, we are running a 30day back to school prayerthlon: 
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-In supporting the back2school campaign run by antibullying, my advice to the young people is to talk to someone if you are unhappy or someone is not being kind. Does your child have someone they can confide in? Sometimes, children choose not to confide in their parents for a multitude of reasons. Identifying that ‘other’ confidant is good.

-If your child or someone you know is/has experienced bullying, you can talk confidentially to someone from Antibullying.
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.Child-line is good for helping children to make sense of their world too.

– Mama do not suffer in silence. Connect with us via whatsapp, email or on facebook and instagram.

Ever felt like not making it and struggling in life? Well, that image above could not be far from how I felt especially in the first five years of motherhood. I just felt that I did not have the neccessary skills and knowledge to blossom in my journey. I remember struggling to get big brother to eat. Oh my days, the boy was such a fussy eater and was as skinny as anything. In those moments, I was a failure and stressed. The health visitor would dimiss my concerns looking at my built and remarking ‘you are not of big built yourself’. True? yes it was, not helpful though. I did all the food diary, monthly weights, multivitamins etc. Sadly I didn’t understand the centile  lines and growth chart. Glad that the teen hormones finally kicked in the boy now eats.

Back in 2015, a friend brought me a very beautiful blooming orchid. I loved it. Prior to that, I had bought one myself from Tesco and sadly didn’t last any long. So it was refreshing to have another variety of this beautiful plant. I watered and placed it on the window sill as suggested on some online forum. Unfortunately, it lasted only a couple months. Distraught and disheartened one of my clients reassured me to keep the stump with the hope that it will bloom again. Blooming again never happened so I threw it away. This was only the first of many other orchid gifts to be given by friends. They never made it. Someone suggested I tried the artificial ones, saw some gorgeous ones in TK Maxx, it’s not the same is it?

I was at a baby shower somewhere in December and I said a couple of nice things to the expectant mom and boom, the orchid came out again. You can imagine the agony I felt. Driving home, I looked at it and gave thanks. I thanked the giver for their heart and consideration, I just wished they knew my bad luck with this type of plant. I went home and just continued to do what I had done with the other plants. Deep down, there was a desire to see it continue to flower and bloom. I wanted it to live. I wanted to break the curse of death on my hands. O how I wanted to succeed and not continue to feel the stench of failure.

I would speak to the plant in the morning before leaving for work, admire it when I am at the sink and do a silent prayer that it makes this time. I would move it from the sunny window sill to the shade of the downstairs lavatory. I was determined and keen. I needed this. Flowering it did but not like the other orchids I saw from friends window sills.

 One day, a dear friend who was visiting asked what plant food I was using for my orchid.  Plant food? The plant had not come with any food in the pouch. Flowers always do, don’t they? I was beyond horrified as I didn’t think I needed to give plant food. Gwen* advised where and what type of plant food I could buy from the shops. I did that and followed the instructions on the packet on how to feed and care for my plant.

The last eighteen years, have shown me that thriving in motherhood takes determination, vulnerability, a community and a whole load of learning. No-matter how many books I read, qualifications I attained, nothing seemed to equip me enough to get the job done  with little stress. Whilst I may have struggled with all this, I believe sometimes all we need to hear is that we are doing a great job. A little reassurance. I thrive in those environments because that’s my kind of learning style. Feedback is key. I have learnt to be deliberate in finding that community and that feedback. Now with two teens in tow, I am forever nagging and asking women who have gone before me to hold my hand.

I don’t know what it feels or looks like to have a son in Uni. Next year will be a first and yes, I have my anxieties. Will he survive is a big one at the moment. Survive on his own cooking, getting up in time for lectures without mom alarm clock?. Will he remember to breathe without me reminding him? Those are the conversations in my head at the moment and I have begun to speak to other mamas about it. I have been fortunate to find those soul sisters.

Here it is, my orchid, eight months down the line, blooming and my heart singing.

What would it take for your journey to be in full bloom and your heart skipping in excitement?  We are a community of mothers, learning, sharing and empowering one another on this journey. If you would like to be part of that community, connect with us via email, instagram or facebook.

“Learn from the mistakes of others. You can’t live long enough to make them all yourself”. Eleanor Roosevelt

Bloom mama, lets bloom 🌸🌺🌼

For those wanting their orchid to thrive, I am using the Miracle grow ‘pour and feed’ plant food from B&M stores  xxx

Migrant women in the U.K.

A story of resilience, rebuilding life in a foreign country and the sacrifice women make. The act of forsaking the familiar for the unknown unites us as people of all age group, colour, creed or nationality. This was the Global Woman Club meeting headed by Mirela Sula.

The energy and camaderie as we entered the room was electrifying. Mirela was prompt to share her STORY and the inspiration behind the Global woman empire. A humble mom of Albanian heritage, who dared the seas for the lights and academia of London. Mirela told how she came with her teenage son to pursue her doctorate and a new life with little on her.

Her journey inspired me as a #migrantmama as she shared about being authentic and determined in the face of challenges and obstacles. What Mirela has managed to achieve is being available, available totally to her followers and those who attend her events. That’s what she portrayed to me as I attended this event. She was happy to engage in one to one conversations, mingle, socialise, obliging take selfies with almost everyone. Within a short space of time, Global Woman Club is being launched in different countries every month.

The anxiety of raising our children in an unknown and unfamiliar culture was the thread of most conversations I had with these amazing mothers. How do you embrace and blend the two cultures? As mothers we agreed that, there are sacrifices to be made, being hopeful and trusting our instinct remains key.

What Mirela Sula and her team have done is provide a platform where women can have a collective voice. A voice, of hope, unity, love and togetherness. I met inspiring women at the Global women event in London. From impleccable clothing designers ;Kotywear, mothers, social media managers, entrepreneurs such as Veronica to empire builders.

If you want to hear or learn more about this amazing movement of migrant women, check out global woman on links below:

.https://instagram.com/p/BmLv2cilTek/

https://globalwomanclub.com/our-story/

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