Flourish
This was our Word for the month of September 2019. Back then, I had received 3 indoor plants in one month. I began to sense that there was a deeper meaning to the random gifts friends gave me.
I am in no way, shape or form good with plants. One friend said ‘ the more reason why I am gifting you plants’. Talk of being stretched 😂
I struggled with a particular plant a bit and had to run back to the giver. She advised me to CAREFULLY trim the dead parts of the leaf, feed the plants organic home food and watch. The organic home fertiliser comprised of overnight soaked banana peels, egg shells and tea bag.
To my amazement, the plant started to thrive.
This was my latest gift, Rejoice and I loved her!
I felt the law of seeding and harvesting was at work in that season. Seeding, weeding, nurturing and tending to plants requires careful attention as well as commitment. The harvest is bountiful to those who will do the work right?
“Lord strengthen my hands in place of hard labour(parenting). Help me not to shrink back or give up. Allow my entrusted plants (children) to flourish through careful considerations.”
Isn’t it amazing that this plant analogy also translates to our role as parents! Many of us we are not confident in this area. We are not sure what fertiliser to apply, how much moisture and where to place the plant so it can thrive and blossom. All this guesswork and stress levels 🤣🤣.
What I have found to be useful is having that trustworthy and well informed friend. Remember that passionate green fingered friend of mine forever gifting plants? Yes, her! Each time I visit her house she has got this new plant, that other plant and they are ALL blossoming. Interestingly, she tells me that she reads a lot about these plants before she buys them. She is careful to follow instructions around watering, plant feed and placement. She chuckles every time I tell her the plant she gifted me has died..
While google is available to all of us, my understanding, patience and interests are clearly not strong in plants. Despite my desire and keenness to have an instagram inspired green house of a living room, it just isn’t happening!
This could be you! You find the whole positive parenting work a total nightmare. You were not raised like that! Your mama didn’t have to bend backwards for your children. You can’t figure out why your children won’t listen and do just as they are told. You are trying everything you know, it just isn’t cutting it! Most of us DO struggle, generally… however, they are some who find teen brain fascinating, others understands the whole child development theory better that they are able to translate it into practice.
My friend do not shy away from asking. Asking trusted friends to show, guide and lead you. Reach out to others who can help.
The upcoming intentional parenting MomBA, is a 6 weeks online crash course on being the effective parent leader that you want to be. More details following soon. There is tons of information available out there, sometimes too much and too overwhelming. Where does one even start to look and who are trusted and qualified people to help?
Intentional parenting stands as a TRUSTED friend who understands some of the complexities and challenges that come with raising children in diaspora. Our strategies are informed by research evidence as well as personal experiences.
We look forward to seeing you FLOURISH in your journey as a parent.
To find out more, get in touch here, via our contact page.
Remain in bloom 🌷
Fadzai x
Hey Fa,
Saturday musings
There are more messy entries which I shall share, once permission is granted 🤣😎
Loved this hence I am sharing with you🤣. Stumbled upon this journal entry whilst tidying the bedrooms. I have never been called Fadzai before so this a WHOLE new level for my cherub. This entire entry has been revelatory for me today 😍.
Can I let you in onto something? I have struggled with the whole parenting shindig. Intentional Parenting exists in my bid to share all my pitfalls and blind spots so YOU do not have to. Once in a while I come across evidence such as this 👆🏾, that reminds me that I do get some things RIGHT. Giving notebooks and stationery gifts to my children has been powerful over the years.
This is a journal entry in 2020 from one of my precious jewels. The global pandemic was in full swing and emotions were raging all over the place in the Nyirenda household. We had the exhausted parents from working in healthcare and then the young adults overwhelmed and literally STUCK at home. It was a mess.
In a bid to get some control, sanity and maintain a level of mental wellness, phones were confiscated and that’s how we ended up here.
To see this entry today 2.4.22, warms my heart to a certain extent. Many a times the decisions we make as parents can be painful as we are not 💯 sure wether we are doing the right thing. And to be honest, there will never be a time you are 💯 sure
Whatever decision you need to make for your family , your children especially, trust your GUT. Utilise the research evidence you have at hand about that particular decision. Ask God to help you and find out from His word what you need to do. Reach out to other TRUSTED parents in confidence.
“Effective, intentional parenting isn’t a two people band. Don’t let anyone lie to you. BUILD a community around you to help, you need it.”
Fadzai
Back to your decision making; What’s the worst that can happen?
That’s one of the questions I ask myself when I need to make an important decision and work my work back to mitigate that WORST thing that can happen.
Take for instance, confiscating the phone from your teen. What’s the worst that can happen?
-S/he may hate you
-She may get another dodgy phone from someone else.
-S/he may get social media withdrawal symptoms; depressed/ angry/ upset etc
-S/he may struggle to reach you in an emergency etc.
You explore all this and plan effectively.
The key and most important question is;
What am I trying to do in my parenting??
For me, I am raising the future . I want to honour God in my parenting. I want to raise independent, secure citizens. All this informs my parenting style, commitment and VISION.
Note books are good for putting your thoughts on paper. This is a very useful strategy to use especially with teens who sometimes may struggle to express themselves.
Do you use notebooks, do you write letters to your child/ren, partner or yourself?
If you haven’t tried it, give a go and let me know…
For those who practice this, how is this working? Let me know in comments below,…
Remain blessed and anchored 🌱
Every blessing.
Fadzai
Wise parents
Who are you walking with in this season?
Who are those wise friends helping you as a parent? The friends who are caring, thoughtful, encouraging and sencire.
📌Find 3 friends that you trust, love and admire.Friends you can be vulnerable and honest with.
🙏🏽Pray for them and their families faithfully. Ask God to use them in your life in a powerful way. Pray that you will be a great friend too.
❤️Let them know that you appreciate their friendship.
💫Be #intentional in cultivating that relationship through spending time and encouraging one another.
By doing that, we are role modelling to our children what it means to be a #FaithfulFriend.
Remain intentional 🌱
Hey mama,
Hey mama, how have you been? You have been on my mind. I am writing this just to encourage someone who may be saying, I don’t have much to give as far as motherhood is concerned. I am tired, weary, overwhelmed, on my own, financially distressed etc. Here is an encouragement for you. God sees your heart and your desires. Offer those to Him.
Let Him carry the weight of motherhood and parenting. His shoulders are broader and His feet steady. Trust Him with the load and allow His rest to give you peace.
Praying for our families especially children is a gift that we give. The Bible says the ‘FERVENT’ prayer of the righteous availeth much (James 5:16 summarised). In another version it reads:
“tremendous power is released through the passionate, heartfelt prayer of a godly believer!”
James (Jacob) 5:16 TPT
I do not think there is anyone who can be as FERVENT as a mum in her desires for her child/ren. May be biased but hey… 😝
Pray however suits you. Pray the WORD over your situation/ circumstance and family. Believe and have confidence in your prayers.
We are continuing with the 6am prayers. For me they have been a source of strength, encouragement and commitment in actively praying for my family and especially myself. I believe it is out of the abundance of what we have that we are able to impact our children. You can’t give what you do not have right?
Here is my prayer for you:.
May you know Gods grace and love in such a tangible and profound way. May His peace be in your homes. May you love and love well 💕
Let us know how we can pray for you https://intentionalparenting.blog/contact/
If you care to join the 6am GMT prayers, via zoom, link is below:
https://us02web.zoom.us/j/6335913172?pwd=MnNlNGhIK0M3TVRWSVliY1ZIeEVtUT09
Meeting ID: 633 591 3172
Passcode: prayer
Till then, remain fervent 🌿
Morning Devotion
Thank you to those who joined this morning. The prayers continue Monday- fridays at 6am GMT for 30mins via zoom.
Today, one of our sisters and #momfriend, led us into praying for ourselves as mothers, to be vessels used in our children’s lives.
Like Moses with the children of Israel, God is asking you, what do you have in your hand? Moses felt inadequate, ill- prepared and unqualified for the assignment ahead of him. Sounds familiar?
Often times as parents we can feel out depth, inadequate and challenged by the demands of parenting. God is saying to you mom, dad…
What do you have?
Yes I know you lack the knowledge, language, understanding. What is it that you have? I want to use what you already have!
The patience, love, joy, hope, aspiration, dreams and visions that you have towards your child/ren, let me use that! Give it to me. Allow my spirit to search deep within you and REVEAL some of the hidden capacities that I have put in you.
it’s those hidden things you possess that I want to use for my glory as you impact and empower your children.
Prayer:
Lord reveal to me what’s in my hand and heart so I can be of use to You. Show me the capabilities and capacity you have given me. Open my spiritual eyes to see. Thank you Holy Spirit for equipping and empowering me as a parent. Amen”
Reading
Luke 10:19
Mathew 16:19
2Peter 1:3
Philippians 4:13
You can join the prayers Monday- Fridays at 6am GMT for 30mins via link below. Copy the link to clipboard for ease of access :
https://us02web.zoom.us/j/6335913172?pwd=MnNlNGhIK0M3TVRWSVliY1ZIeEVtUT09. Passcode: prayer
Remain blessed, watered and intentional 🌱
Hello August
August is always such a beautiful month for me . In my native country of Zimbabwe, August is spring time. It represents the budding and springing you of new things. I get excited!
Growing up, August was always school holidays. It meant visiting my maternal grandmother in the country side, being spoilt on farm produce and then attending the annual Harare Agricultural Show. It was such a highlight across the country as farmers show cased their produce. There were games, rides , food, music, fireworks you name it.,
August is also our wedding anniversary month. It’s such a time filled with celebrations and love.
As I have gotten older and matured in my spiritual walk, I tend to seek Gods word for this new month and for my birthday. I take time to pray, read the word and fast ahead of my birthday. I have to admit that the past 6years it has been phenomenal. On most occasions, my cousin sister has joined or invited me to a fast ahead of my birthday. Having someone to journey with and hold you accountable makes such a difference.
I have seen situations shift in such a phenomenal way. I have also been given clear directions through scriptures or words from two other women that God tends to use in my life. I am grateful for their lives and obedience to God.
As such this year is no different. If anything, we have never needed Gods direction like we do in this unprecedented year of 2020.
Below is my prayer for August. Why don’t you join me in making those declarations;
“Lord I thank You for this new month. Thank You for going ahead of me and levelling every high ground. Thank You for silencing every voice of confusion and giving me clarity of purpose and mind. I declare that August is blessed and I am blessed with the riches of Your presence. My household and friends are blessed. I declare that no weapon fashioned or formed against me will prosper and every word spoken in judgement I will refute, I will not be silent. I declare that I am called for such a time as this. I am operating from a place of alignment. My heart and mind are in the right place in You. I hear and I obey. The Holy Spirit is my friend and confidant, constantly reminding me of Your heart and intentions concerning my life. I am empowered and strengthened. I serve from a place of authority and understanding. My helpers are available and I see them with the eyes of the Spirit. I am attentive to Your gentle whispers and nudging. I am a city on a hill that cannot be hidden. My light shines bright enabling others to see and not stumble in darkness. I radiate Your beauty and light. Amen”
Go ahead and enjoy Gods goodness. Be sure to keep Him at the centre of all your decision making and thought process. Be diligent in spending time in prayer, meditation and His word. If you are fasting, saturate your mind with Gods presence through music, reading and meditation.
Don’t forget to write down the things that God lays on your heart. Carry a notebook or use your smartphone notes to capture these. Be expectant. Expect God to say something through the word, music, friends etc .
When you are at home, it’s a good idea to fill your home with gospel or worship music. I personally enjoy premier radio or UCB 2. Alternatively, you can stream youtube videos of messages that encourage, uplift and most importantly TEACH.
I will be sharing my own journey in this month.
Be sure to follow here on the blog, facebook or instagram.
Every blessing
Fadzai x
Momleader
Message to my webinar attendees 24.4.2020
Hope this finds you well. This morning we prayed that God will help us to strengthen the family altar. I truly believe God has called us into a powerful season as mothers in Zion.In this season, God desires for family foundations to be strengthened better than ever. Connecting with our children and partners like never before. That vision will require an unwavering commitment and understanding that with God’s help we can do all things. I pray that you find time to truly connect/ know and understand your child/ren. To be committed to praying and speaking Gods promises concerning them.
In the mad rush of previous life, we were robbed of those opportunities. May God help us all. Simple things such as eating together at the dinner table with no phones, are powerful. Be committed to conversations at the dinner table. Start with simple questions such as ‘how has been your day? what did you like and what didn’t you like. Share what you personally enjoyed during the day, what were your struggles and how are you are finding solutions to those challenges.
Whilst it’s tempting to let the children do their own things especially if they are older or even adults, this is a perfect opportunity to effect their lives. Reach out in love. It may be uncomfortable at the start if you are not used to this, believe me, it’s worth the try and sticking it out.
This is also a great time to uproot those teachings in our schools and society. For months some of us were worried about the primary school curriculum. Here we are and it’s our opportunity to plant the truth into the hearts and minds of our children. Remember no topic is out of bounds. Talk about friendships, relationships, sex, faith etc. Our children desire to hear our honest opinions on these matters because we are their parents and they look up to us. Yes, I know sometimes it may look as if they don’t, listen, they do.
How about looking back to the family photos albums that have been piling up for years? It’s also a great opportunity to connect. If there are baby photos, share your pregnant journey. If possible, try not to focus on the glossy bits only, share the struggle and upheavals because life is like that.
Talk about your vision of a family. What do you hope to accomplish as a family.? What values are important to you as a family. For example, mine as a mother family, love and service. I am always encouraging and explaining to my two that family life is important and that value is demonstrated through actions. Things such as the regular video calls to my parents, WhatsApp chats with my siblings and phone calls to the sisters in my life. Relationships are important and we invest time and efforts. My children are fortunate to see some of the impact some of you have in my life.
May Gods love surround you always. May His peace reign supreme in your homes.
With love and blessings
Fadzai 🌸
Parenting strategies
09.04.18
Today I will step out with the understanding of how I prayed and prepared for this job. I will remember the things I promised I would do both on my CV/ resume’ and interview.
Intentional parenting 