Hey Q
Prayer for my son on your birthday
Becoming your mama was and continues to be my greatest legacy. Growing together has been exhilarating, exciting and challenging at most times. Can’t wait for what the future holds. Intentional parenting is you son. Thank you for the many lessons learnt that I get to share with other parents. Thank you for your patience as I continually learn how to mother you better. Thank you for your understanding that at most times, I am winging it with you. Thank you for the grace you extend when I am able to get it right with your sister. I love being your mama.
So today on your birthday I pray that you continually know who you are in God’s eyes. I pray that your light will shine brighter before your generation. I pray that you never have to doubt yourself, second guess Gods purpose and capabilities that are in you. I pray that you will continue to rest in the love we have for you as your parents. I ask God to lead and guide you all the days of your life. Above all I pray that you will walk in Gods purpose, utilising all the gifts and talents that God has given you. I pray for your friends who are your greatest social capita, that they would love you sincerely, be there for you faithfully and that they would encourage you in all things. Quinton, I pray that in all things you will allow your faith to speak louder than your fears. Love you always MaiQ.
Brethren
Stumbled upon this verse and I have to admit, I was astounded!
Astounded maybe because of my inadequacies, my flawed inability to stand long enough together with fellow bethren to see their prayers answered. Yet the Lord commands us to ‘stand together UNTIL”.
When was the last time you stood in faith with someone for those things that He answered in your own life?
#purpose
#bethrenhood 🙏🏽❤
Flourish
This was our Word for the month of September 2019. Back then, I had received 3 indoor plants in one month. I began to sense that there was a deeper meaning to the random gifts friends gave me.
I am in no way, shape or form good with plants. One friend said ‘ the more reason why I am gifting you plants’. Talk of being stretched 😂
I struggled with a particular plant a bit and had to run back to the giver. She advised me to CAREFULLY trim the dead parts of the leaf, feed the plants organic home food and watch. The organic home fertiliser comprised of overnight soaked banana peels, egg shells and tea bag.
To my amazement, the plant started to thrive.
This was my latest gift, Rejoice and I loved her!
I felt the law of seeding and harvesting was at work in that season. Seeding, weeding, nurturing and tending to plants requires careful attention as well as commitment. The harvest is bountiful to those who will do the work right?
“Lord strengthen my hands in place of hard labour(parenting). Help me not to shrink back or give up. Allow my entrusted plants (children) to flourish through careful considerations.”
Isn’t it amazing that this plant analogy also translates to our role as parents! Many of us we are not confident in this area. We are not sure what fertiliser to apply, how much moisture and where to place the plant so it can thrive and blossom. All this guesswork and stress levels 🤣🤣.
What I have found to be useful is having that trustworthy and well informed friend. Remember that passionate green fingered friend of mine forever gifting plants? Yes, her! Each time I visit her house she has got this new plant, that other plant and they are ALL blossoming. Interestingly, she tells me that she reads a lot about these plants before she buys them. She is careful to follow instructions around watering, plant feed and placement. She chuckles every time I tell her the plant she gifted me has died..
While google is available to all of us, my understanding, patience and interests are clearly not strong in plants. Despite my desire and keenness to have an instagram inspired green house of a living room, it just isn’t happening!
This could be you! You find the whole positive parenting work a total nightmare. You were not raised like that! Your mama didn’t have to bend backwards for your children. You can’t figure out why your children won’t listen and do just as they are told. You are trying everything you know, it just isn’t cutting it! Most of us DO struggle, generally… however, they are some who find teen brain fascinating, others understands the whole child development theory better that they are able to translate it into practice.
My friend do not shy away from asking. Asking trusted friends to show, guide and lead you. Reach out to others who can help.
The upcoming intentional parenting MomBA, is a 6 weeks online crash course on being the effective parent leader that you want to be. More details following soon. There is tons of information available out there, sometimes too much and too overwhelming. Where does one even start to look and who are trusted and qualified people to help?
Intentional parenting stands as a TRUSTED friend who understands some of the complexities and challenges that come with raising children in diaspora. Our strategies are informed by research evidence as well as personal experiences.
We look forward to seeing you FLOURISH in your journey as a parent.
To find out more, get in touch here, via our contact page.
Remain in bloom 🌷
Fadzai x
Hey Fa,
Saturday musings
There are more messy entries which I shall share, once permission is granted 🤣😎
Loved this hence I am sharing with you🤣. Stumbled upon this journal entry whilst tidying the bedrooms. I have never been called Fadzai before so this a WHOLE new level for my cherub. This entire entry has been revelatory for me today 😍.
Can I let you in onto something? I have struggled with the whole parenting shindig. Intentional Parenting exists in my bid to share all my pitfalls and blind spots so YOU do not have to. Once in a while I come across evidence such as this 👆🏾, that reminds me that I do get some things RIGHT. Giving notebooks and stationery gifts to my children has been powerful over the years.
This is a journal entry in 2020 from one of my precious jewels. The global pandemic was in full swing and emotions were raging all over the place in the Nyirenda household. We had the exhausted parents from working in healthcare and then the young adults overwhelmed and literally STUCK at home. It was a mess.
In a bid to get some control, sanity and maintain a level of mental wellness, phones were confiscated and that’s how we ended up here.
To see this entry today 2.4.22, warms my heart to a certain extent. Many a times the decisions we make as parents can be painful as we are not 💯 sure wether we are doing the right thing. And to be honest, there will never be a time you are 💯 sure
Whatever decision you need to make for your family , your children especially, trust your GUT. Utilise the research evidence you have at hand about that particular decision. Ask God to help you and find out from His word what you need to do. Reach out to other TRUSTED parents in confidence.
“Effective, intentional parenting isn’t a two people band. Don’t let anyone lie to you. BUILD a community around you to help, you need it.”
Fadzai
Back to your decision making; What’s the worst that can happen?
That’s one of the questions I ask myself when I need to make an important decision and work my work back to mitigate that WORST thing that can happen.
Take for instance, confiscating the phone from your teen. What’s the worst that can happen?
-S/he may hate you
-She may get another dodgy phone from someone else.
-S/he may get social media withdrawal symptoms; depressed/ angry/ upset etc
-S/he may struggle to reach you in an emergency etc.
You explore all this and plan effectively.
The key and most important question is;
What am I trying to do in my parenting??
For me, I am raising the future . I want to honour God in my parenting. I want to raise independent, secure citizens. All this informs my parenting style, commitment and VISION.
Note books are good for putting your thoughts on paper. This is a very useful strategy to use especially with teens who sometimes may struggle to express themselves.
Do you use notebooks, do you write letters to your child/ren, partner or yourself?
If you haven’t tried it, give a go and let me know…
For those who practice this, how is this working? Let me know in comments below,…
Remain blessed and anchored 🌱
Every blessing.
Fadzai
Wise parents
Who are you walking with in this season?
Who are those wise friends helping you as a parent? The friends who are caring, thoughtful, encouraging and sencire.
📌Find 3 friends that you trust, love and admire.Friends you can be vulnerable and honest with.
🙏🏽Pray for them and their families faithfully. Ask God to use them in your life in a powerful way. Pray that you will be a great friend too.
❤️Let them know that you appreciate their friendship.
💫Be #intentional in cultivating that relationship through spending time and encouraging one another.
By doing that, we are role modelling to our children what it means to be a #FaithfulFriend.
Remain intentional 🌱
Hey mama,
Hey mama, how have you been? You have been on my mind. I am writing this just to encourage someone who may be saying, I don’t have much to give as far as motherhood is concerned. I am tired, weary, overwhelmed, on my own, financially distressed etc. Here is an encouragement for you. God sees your heart and your desires. Offer those to Him.
Let Him carry the weight of motherhood and parenting. His shoulders are broader and His feet steady. Trust Him with the load and allow His rest to give you peace.
Praying for our families especially children is a gift that we give. The Bible says the ‘FERVENT’ prayer of the righteous availeth much (James 5:16 summarised). In another version it reads:
“tremendous power is released through the passionate, heartfelt prayer of a godly believer!”
James (Jacob) 5:16 TPT
I do not think there is anyone who can be as FERVENT as a mum in her desires for her child/ren. May be biased but hey… 😝
Pray however suits you. Pray the WORD over your situation/ circumstance and family. Believe and have confidence in your prayers.
We are continuing with the 6am prayers. For me they have been a source of strength, encouragement and commitment in actively praying for my family and especially myself. I believe it is out of the abundance of what we have that we are able to impact our children. You can’t give what you do not have right?
Here is my prayer for you:.
May you know Gods grace and love in such a tangible and profound way. May His peace be in your homes. May you love and love well 💕
Let us know how we can pray for you https://intentionalparenting.blog/contact/
If you care to join the 6am GMT prayers, via zoom, link is below:
https://us02web.zoom.us/j/6335913172?pwd=MnNlNGhIK0M3TVRWSVliY1ZIeEVtUT09
Meeting ID: 633 591 3172
Passcode: prayer
Till then, remain fervent 🌿
Morning Devotion
Thank you to those who joined this morning. The prayers continue Monday- fridays at 6am GMT for 30mins via zoom.
Today, one of our sisters and #momfriend, led us into praying for ourselves as mothers, to be vessels used in our children’s lives.
Like Moses with the children of Israel, God is asking you, what do you have in your hand? Moses felt inadequate, ill- prepared and unqualified for the assignment ahead of him. Sounds familiar?
Often times as parents we can feel out depth, inadequate and challenged by the demands of parenting. God is saying to you mom, dad…
What do you have?
Yes I know you lack the knowledge, language, understanding. What is it that you have? I want to use what you already have!
The patience, love, joy, hope, aspiration, dreams and visions that you have towards your child/ren, let me use that! Give it to me. Allow my spirit to search deep within you and REVEAL some of the hidden capacities that I have put in you.
it’s those hidden things you possess that I want to use for my glory as you impact and empower your children.
Prayer:
Lord reveal to me what’s in my hand and heart so I can be of use to You. Show me the capabilities and capacity you have given me. Open my spiritual eyes to see. Thank you Holy Spirit for equipping and empowering me as a parent. Amen”
Reading
Luke 10:19
Mathew 16:19
2Peter 1:3
Philippians 4:13
You can join the prayers Monday- Fridays at 6am GMT for 30mins via link below. Copy the link to clipboard for ease of access :
https://us02web.zoom.us/j/6335913172?pwd=MnNlNGhIK0M3TVRWSVliY1ZIeEVtUT09. Passcode: prayer
Remain blessed, watered and intentional 🌱
Exam
Praying and wishing all the children sitting their exams this month of May all the success they need.
May they remember what they have revised. May they have peace and confidence in their ability. Above all, we pray that they will know that their worth isn’t measured in grades.
We pray for the parents that they will be supportive and encouraging. May parents be realistic in their expectations. We ask that parents affirm and reassure their children. Lord let your peace, love and calmness invade our homes.
We stand against any spirit of anxiety, worry, stress, depression, unrealistic expectations, confusion and restlessness. We push back on territorial and seasonal spirits that rise up in this season causing havoc in family life.
We lift up our schools. May they be places of safety and learning. We ask that you empower the leaders in the schools to be attentive, available, astute and aware of the needs of the children in their schools. Give them the courage to remain open, honesty and transparent to the challenges they face in their schools. When they have done so, please help them to find help and solutions to those needs. Father, help the teachers to know and remember how powerful they are in the lives of the children. As they walk through this exam season, walk with them, with their fears, worries and anxieties. Allow them to realise the fruits of their head work.
Thank you for our tertiary places of education; colleges, universities and apprenticeships. Help and guide these young adults in their decision making and life preparation. Remind each and everyone of them, that you KNOW their future and you want them to do well. Help them to trust you with their future. Quiten the internal battles and societal expectations. This exam period, help them in all the ways they need this month and beyond.
Thank you Lord that you hear and answer us. Amen
Dear parent
Saw this on facebook and had to share. While it’s advise to people with young children, it’s a reminder to us all of how quick time flies and that one day our little babies too will be all grown up.
When you first have children they talk about the challenges of parenting….the struggles of a baby waking in the night,
the toddler who won’t stay in their bed, the cost of childcare, injuries from sports…
Having to take off work to pick them up from school when they don’t feel well, helping them with homework, a messy house, the never ending laundry, the cost to buy school clothes, packing their lunches….
You watch their eyes light up on Christmas morning….and try to soak in the magic of those moments.
You coach them in sports, rushing to practices and ballgames…and tote them all over the country to let them play the game they love…no matter how exhausting or expensive it becomes.
Life is just so busy that you rarely even stop to think what the end of those days look like.
In fact, it’s not really even something you can wrap your mind around.
You go into it thinking that 18-20 years sounds like a long time….
Then suddenly hours turn into days…days into months…and months into years.
That little person that used to crawl up next to you in bed and cuddle up to watch cartoons…suddenly becomes this young adult who hugs you in the hallway as they come and go.
And the chaos and laughter that used to echo throughout your home….gets filled with silence and solitude.
You’ve learned how to parent a child who needs you to care for and protect them….but have no clue how the whole “letting go” thing is supposed to work.
So you hold on as tight as you can…wondering how time passed so quickly…feeling guilty that you missed something….
Because even though you had 20 years…..it just somehow doesn’t seem like it was enough.
You ask yourself so many questions…
Did you teach them the right lessons?
Did you read them enough books as a child?
Spend enough time playing with them?
How many school parties did you have to miss?
Do they really know how much you love them?
What could I have done better as a parent?
…..When it’s time for them to go, it all hits you like a ton of bricks.
And all you can do is pray….hope….and trust that God will protect them as they start to make their way into the world alone.
Parenting is by far the most amazing experience of your life….that at times leaves you exhilarated….while others leave you heartbroken.
But one thing is certain…..it’s never enough time…💕
So for all the parents with young children…whose days are spent trying to figure out how to make it through the madness…
Exhausted day in and day out…
Soak. It. All. In.
Because one day….all those crazy days full of cartoons, snuggles, sleep overs, Christmas morning magic, ballgames, practices and late night dinners…
All come to an end.
And you’re left hoping that you did enough right, so that when they spread their wings….
They’ll fly…💕💕
Intentional parenting 